Ramadan Reflections

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For the approximately 1.6 Billion Muslims around the world, this is the Holy month of Ramadan, where Muslims abstain from food and drink from sun up to sun down for 30 days. Fasting is one of the five pillars of Islam – the others are Faith, Prayer, Charity, and the Pilgrimage to Mecca. This year I’ve been journaling a little every morning after Sehri (the morning meal) and I thought it would be fun to share with you some reflections I’ve made from fasting in Ramadan, now that we are finally in the home stretch.

 For me the hardest part about fasting isn’t the lack of food and water, but the mental challenges that go with it. First of all just waking up at the crack of dawn to eat before fasting all day shakes me out of my normal routine. I notice all of my mindless habits, like snacking to procrastinate dealing with something, or snacking out of boredom, or sadness, or happiness (I snack a lot). The point is I am forced to become much more aware and intentional in my actions.

On the same note, I’ve noticed my mental attitude has a direct effect on how easy or difficult fasting is for me. If I go about my day begrudgingly fasting, in victim mode thinking about how hard it is, I will really struggle. If I do it with positive intention, and a goal of getting stronger spiritually, it honestly becomes a pleasure. It has taken me years to get to this stage where I can actually enjoy and find pleasure in fasting. Knowing that ultimately I am the one in control of how I feel, is incredibly empowering. This mind over matter attitude could improve so many other aspects of my life – fitness, work, relationships, money, everything.

One of the things I struggle with most while fasting is trying not to lose my temper, and avoiding negativity and gossip. The other day my kids were driving me up the wall but I was so wiped out from fasting I didn’t even have the energy to yell at them so I took some deep breaths and turned on a podcast I liked and just immersed myself in other stuff. What happened after that was they eventually stopped doing whatever it was that made me crazy, (like they always do) and I didn’t have to go in to full on psycho mom mode, which is something that I always regret later. Gossip is also something that is so hard to avoid, but I’ve learned when I keep quiet and don’t add any fuel to the fire, the people gossiping with me usually lose interest and change the subject.

After the initial excitement of Ramadan wears off and it’s just day after day of sitting with myself, slightly weaker trying to be as productive as possible (and failing miserably), this is the hardest time for me. It forces me to humble myself and slow down, when my ego just wants to keep achieving. My ego is constantly being challenged this month, when I’m not able to distract myself with food and drink for long stretches, I find myself feeling uncomfortable, emotional, and vulnerable. Learning to sit with myself and feel all the feelings gives me the space to really work on myself and become more conscious.

I first heard the statement ‘you consume much more than food’ a while ago from Deepak Chopra but it really set in the other day while I was fasting. Eating is just one of the many things we consume. Everything you see, hear, touch, or smell, you are consuming. When I’m focusing on consuming things that will raise my spiritual vibration like laughing with my friends or family, praying, mediating, or taking a walk outside feeling the warm sunshine or smelling the flowers  – I feel way more ‘full’ in every sense of the word.

I’m definitely looking forward to going back to enjoying all of life’s indulgences again soon – but this month of Ramadan has given me a lot of gifts I will hold on to forever.

 

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Last week we took a quick trip to escape the snow for some sunshine in Key Largo, Florida☀️ We spent every moment possible outside, Tom and Adam got their Scuba Diver PADI certification (yay!) while Sophia and I spent our days either swimming or drawing marine life and landscapes. This was my first trip after my sister passed last November, and even though I look so happy here, there were so many moments I felt the grief and sadness, as if it happened just yesterday. I am still figuring out how I want to show up in this space, as I have changed so much as a person since the loss. I just don’t feel called to post some of the things I shared before. Maybe that will change someday, or maybe it will just naturally evolve into something new. I think I will take this year to just process it all. (Even the idea of taking an entire year to think through something is a huge shift for my usually hyperactive type A personality) My focus at the moment is just living in the moment with my family and friends, spending time doing things that make me happy and healthy. I hope to share some of that journey here with you ~ thanks for following along ❤️
I had planned to shoot this outfit in collaboration with @lenacoutureofficial right before my dear sister passed away. Saba, the designer, was more than understanding if I didn’t want to anymore - but after thinking on it for a while I decided I wanted to - in my sister’s honor 💗 She was always my biggest hype woman. When i would feel like I’m not good enough or that I should quit (which was often) she would tell me I was unique and great and to keep it up. When I think of my sister, beauty and love is all that she embodied in her being. She expressed that on the outside also - as she loved to wear everything glam, bright & colorful, and full of bling. Hair done, nails done, everything did - that was Nusrat. For this shoot I took the time to get glam after a long hiatus - and makeup and hair took so long because I think I forgot how to do it, but afterwards I was surprised how I felt transformed. When I wore this gorgeous outfit that I know was designed with such love and incredible attention to detail by @lenacoutureofficial, I felt all of that beauty - like a walking piece of art, and very much at peace. Thank you so much to @divmophoto for capturing the feeling so well 💕
Ski weekend with my favorites ❄️❄️ So proud of Sophia for skiing on her own for the first time!
There are some trees with seeds that only grow after a fire. Their seeds are completely sealed with a resin that have to be physically melted off by a great fire in order to propagate. So to do we as humans, gain wisdom only after great pain and suffering.*
A month ago (and one day) I lost my sister and best friend to cancer. I am still completely gutted and broken. But, I’m also so so grateful to have had felt the love that now brings me so much heartbreak. ❤️ I am so inspired by her - and I will forever live my life to honor her memory. Miss you sis ❤️
Classic outfit combo: oversized blazer + denim 🖤fendi mules @shoeslutz
Just a mom who loves mums 🌸 🪴
Cozy for a coffee date ☕️
French. Toast. Egg. Bake. Save this recipe for a weekend or holiday brunch - it’s SO good and fool-proof! I’m not even a sweet person and I love it. The pecans are a non-negotiable IMO - I get honey bourbon vanilla pecans for this and it is just heavenly. Enjoy!